While it may sound as if I need to go to conference rehab, I say “No, no, no!”

I attend all these conferences simply because I love learning and I love sharing what I’ve learned.

At Y’all Connect, a blogging and social media conference held in Birmingham, I learned about the importance of knowing your audience, that helping someone for free today can actually pay off big tomorrow, the value of visual content, and much more.

At BlogHer ’14 in San Jose, California, I got inspired to blog as if my life depends on it. (And I got to meet Arianna Huffington and share the same air with Kerry Washington!)

And at the Bloganista Mini-Con, a conference for fashion, fitness and lifestyle bloggers that I hosted through See Jane Write Birmingham, I was inspired by speakers like Megan LaRussa Chenoweth to work on taking my writing career and See Jane Write to higher heights.

Last month I attended WordCamp Birmingham and a talk by Reneta Tsankova, chief operations officer at SiteGround.com, helped me see branding in a new way. So often blogging gurus and social media marketers tell us writers and entrepreneurs that we need to see ourselves as brands. And that just sounds dirty! Thinking of yourself as a brand can feel cheap, shallow, or even dehumanizing. But Tsankova talked about branding in a way that really resonated with me. She said that when it comes to branding we should focus on values.

What are your values? How will you showcase these values? What makes you (or your business) different? What do other people think makes you (or your business) different?

Drafting a list of values for the See Jane Write network was simple. I value self-expression through storytelling and the written word, women’s empowerment, wellness (especially exercise and physical fitness), and Birmingham — I am devoted to making my city a better place. While I’m not sure what other people think makes See Jane Write different from other networking groups, I believe we offer a safe space for women to learn about blogging, business, writing, and social media — a place without pressure or pretense.

Thanks to all these conferences I attended this summer I feel I am truly headed to the next level as a writer, as an entrepreneur, and even as a woman.

This month I’ll be posting articles that are all somehow tied to the importance of learning. I hope they will inspire as much as this summer’s conferences inspired me.

xo,

Javacia Harris Bowser

Founding Editor

What would you do if you weren’t afraid?

That’s the question Sheryl Sandberg posed to women in the audience during her keynote talk at last month’s BlogHer ’13 conference in Chicago.

Placed in the center of the tables at which we attendees were seated were sheets of paper with the same question printed at the bottom. Sandberg wanted us to write down our answer, take a picture holding our written declarations and then leave ready to go after our dreams.

Despite the fact that Sheryl Sandberg is the kind of woman that really makes you feel like you can do anything, I just took one of the sheets and slipped it into my bag. I couldn’t figure out what to write!

Last year this time, without a second thought, I would have written: “Start my own magazine.” But on July 1 I conquered that fear and launched this site.

I thought about writing: “Be a feminist blogger.” I spent much of my time at the conference kicking around the idea of re-launching my personal blog as one that focuses solely on feminism instead of one that mostly focuses on the world of writing from a woman’s perspective. But then during her talk, Sandberg said that she wants to be unapologetically a business executive and unapologetically a feminist. And I knew exactly what she meant.

I am a feminist and proud to say so. But I also want to be a well-respected writer; I want to be known as a social entrepreneur who strives to empower women to find their voice and share their stories. I refuse to choose between writer and feminist. I am both and my personal blog should be a reflection of that.

A few days later while thinking about Sandberg’s best-selling book Lean In and the theme for See Jane Write Magazine this month my answer came to me. If I weren’t afraid I would “TAKE THE LEAD.”

Let me explain.

Lean In showed me that most of my life I’ve been acting like a little princess, but not in the way people typically mean when they say that. In her book, Sandberg talks about the “Tiara Syndrome,” a term coined by Carol Frohlinger and Deborah Kolb, founders of Negotiating Women, Inc. The “Tiara Syndrome” is where women “expect that if they keep doing their job well someone will notice them and place a tiara on their head.”

Guilty as charged.

I am a worker bee. Give me a task and I will work on it from dusk to dawn if that’s what it takes to get the job done and get the job done well; and I won’t even ask for overtime pay. This is exactly what I did at my previous newspaper job and I thought all this hard work would automatically lead to the promotion I wanted. When it did not I was devastated, but I had only myself to blame. I didn’t aggressively go after the position I coveted. I thought it would land in my lap, I thought the tiara would be placed on my head simply because of all those long hours. And I was wrong.

As Sandberg writes in her book, “Hard work and results should be recognized by others, but when they aren’t, advocating for oneself becomes necessary.”

And so I am taking the lead. I am drafting a new bucket list, constructing a new vision board and instead of waiting for opportunities to be handed to me, I’m going to create the opportunities I desire. Instead of waiting for my metaphorical prince to choose me, I choose myself. I will aggressively go after every goal and I will not apologize for my ambition.

In August many of our articles will celebrate women who are taking the lead in their careers and in their communities.

My hope is that their stories will inspire you do to the same.

And it’s OK if you’re afraid. Being courageous is about feeling the fear and pressing on in spite of it.

What would you do if you weren’t afraid?

Social media channels like LinkedIn, Facebook and Twitter opened up a world of online networking that was quite the dream come true for shy, introverted writers and bloggers. But one of the best ways to promote your work, even if your work primarily lives online, is to step away from the computer and meet new people, in person.

Last week I had the opportunity to travel to Chicago to attend BlogHer ’13, the world’s largest blogging conference for women. This was my first BlogHer and I was thankful that the first day of workshops kicked off with what was called the “Newbie Breakfast,” a morning session for first-time BlogHer attendees.

At the breakfast Sandy Jones-Kaminski, author of I’m at a Networking Event – Now What? gave tips on the best way to meet new people at conferences like BlogHer.

1. Stop staring at your phone. If you’re at a conference alone and waiting for a workshop session to start, it’s tempting to take out your phone and start checking email and scrolling through your Instagram or Twitter feeds. But if you put the phone away and sit with a pleasant look on your face, chances are someone else rolling solo will come introduce herself and you’ll have a new blogging buddy.

2. Open conversations with common ground. When networking at conferences you know you and the folks around you have at least one thing in common – you’re all at the freaking conference! So break the ice by simply asking the stranger next to you why she decided to attend.

3. Ask easy-to-answer questions. Ask questions related to the topic of the conference. If you’re attending a blogging conference ask the person next to you what her blog is about. If you’re at a writing conference ask your fellow attendee about her work-in-progress. If you’re at a social media conference strike up a conversation about Twitter, Facebook, Google + or LinkedIn. Ask if she’s on Instagram or Pinterest or if she’s into Vine.

4. Listen. Good networking isn’t about doing a lot of talking; it’s about getting other people to talk. During her presentation, Jones-Kaminski mentioned a great quote from Guy Kawasaki, who was also a speaker at this year’s BlogHer. Kawasaki once said: “The mark of a good conversationalist is not that you can talk a lot. The mark is that you can get others to talk a lot. Thus, good schmoozers are good listeners, not good talkers.”

5. Have your business cards and pen handy. Bring plenty of business cards and stash them in an easy-to-access spot, not the bottom of your purse. I’d suggest placing them in your plastic nametag holder. Write a note on the cards you collect so when you follow up (and you should always follow up) you will remember who this person is and what you discussed.

6. Don’t be a jerk. Those are my words, not Jones-Kaminiski’s, but I think that phrase sums up many of the tips she gave. Once you have found some conference buddies, don’t turn into the mean girls clique. Welcome others into your circle. Also, don’t make it rain with your business cards (again, my interpretation). Exchange cards only after you’ve actually started a conversation with someone. And don’t get drunk. I know you may think you need liquid courage to talk to strangers but I doubt you want to be remembered as the chick who had to be carried out of the conference after-party.